Saturday, September 10, 2011
Opting Out of Emails from Gay Men -- with Mutual Respect!!!
Email response to anonymous gentleman from Wilmington, NC who called to ask me not to email him. I still do not know who he is:
Hi Kp . . . @aol.com,
Thanks for calling and letting me know your desire not to be emailed by a homosexual. Good luck with that, but since so many married men are having sex with men behind their wives' backs here in Wilmington, it will be hard for you to know where to draw the line. Several totally straight guys in Wilmington who have a career of satisfying frustrated women whose husbands married them just to APPEAR straight tell me they are certain that only one out of eight married WHITE men in Wilmington are truly straight. I believe they exaggerate. According to the Kinsey Report (published before everyone got so sensitized and defensive about the issue around 1950), about 2/3 of men have sex with men at least once in their adult life, just under a majority continue to do so at least occassionally, regardless their married status. If all were honest, you'd have few people you were comfortable with.
I'm guessing I got your email address when I was homeless, living in my car (I'm no longer homeless -- PRAISE JESUS!!!), and sent people electronic copies of my book, WALKING ON GLASS: A MEMOIR OF THE LATER DAYS OF TENNESSEE WILLIAMS, in exchange for gasoline. Since your email address is one of the few that do not identify the owner, I have and had no idea who you are, but sometimes send email to all addresses remembered by my online email program, Gmail. Its automatic address memory have been hacked many times, deleting many names, so many have been lost. I do not know how to remove anyone from this memory (it is NOT my actual deliberate address book) so suggest you block my address to prevent any future missives from me, although I will try to remember not to send to you.
My Kenan relatives have a very high percentage of gay men. Even Will (William R. Kenan, Jr.) Henry Flagler's right-hand-man in Florida (like John D. Rockefeller was his right-hand man in the Standard Oil Trust -- it is a bit of a secret that Flagler actually invented the interstate corporation, founded Standard Oil Trust, and controlled twice as much stock as his front man, Rockefeller), who began the granddaddy of Kenan Charitable Trusts, the Williams R. Kenan Charitable Trust, moved in with his long-term secretary, Scotty, when his wife died. And Mary Lily Kenan Flagler (Flagler's last wife and basically sole heir) was best friends with the Pembroke Joneses, who travelled everywhere as three -- including Pembroke's male lover.
Now, my own church, First Presbyterian, here in Wilmington, NC, is coming to terms with the now official Presbyterian position that gay people are called by God -- like ALL people -- to their particular manifestation of sexuality, and since they cannot yet marry (most places), can, in fact, be ordained ministers if having sex outside marriage, something not approved for straight Presbyterian ministers. This has caused some angst within the Presbyterian Church, and our congregation reflects that soul-searching. It is a credit to our ministers that so far the debate remains civilized and we have not broken off, destroying the Presbyterian family.
Should that happen, it would leave First Presbyterian in a very awkward situation, given that so much of the church physical plant was given by my distant, now-deceased Kenan relatives who all seem to have been Sexual Libertarians. Tommy Kenan, now "head" of the wealthy branch of the family and I once (seperate times) had the same boyfriend here in Wilmington in the 1980s. Even today, the debate of whether to embrace truth or hypocrisy goes on.
One prominent member, District Attorney Benjamin R. David, whose male lover, Lee -- his actual name despite my previous blogging as if it were fictitious -- and I are in quite a political battle over hypocrisy, and not just about sexuality, but Ben's cocaine use and protection of major drug traffickers in the Port of Wilmington: Land, Sea, and Air.
Good news for those who are sick of the corrupting scourge of hard drugs in our society (no one includes marijuana here): I've got Ben David pretty well check-mated now. And my own mother (Dick Cheney's boss -- search my blog), as well. Thank God for the ongoing moral and material support of so many caring Wilmingtonians, including many prominent citizens!!!
You can read about my ongoing legal and other battles on my political blog http://scottkenan.blogspot.com/ , where I will post this letter without identifying you.
In closing, I'd like to thank you for your very respectful manner of asking me the favor of not emailing you since I am a gay man. Because no two people are entirely alike in mind, respect is so important to discourse. I will remember you and your call with the highest respect and genuinely try not to email you again. I dare say, however, that it will be impossible for you not to get emails from men who have sex with other men -- at least occassionally. That would be the majority of men -- no matter what we claim. The easiest way to know who is hiding is to observe the emotion generated. No man who is truly straight -- which I assume you are -- has a thing to fear from a gay or bisexual person, so he will be at least (like you) respectful, and usually have a keen sense of humor about it.
Those who get all emotional are usually hiding from their own true sexuality -- or are flat-out frauds, typically hiding behind a wife who necessarily (yet actually unnecessarily), becomes quite sexually frustrated. It's ESPECIALLY unfair to the women!!! You can search psychology texts to learn of this problem. Even most straight people know that men who denounce gay men (and women, but with less emotion), are hiding from society -- or worse yet, from themselves.
All best to you, sir. You will not hear from me again, but if in a hurried (or pressured) moment, I forget not to email you, I hope you will forgive me -- best to block my email address, just in case . . .
Scott D. Kenan