Subject: Tuesday night fun in Picturesque Stone Mountain Village (this is a unique, hybrid literary form that I use here)
From: Scott Kenan
Date: May 4, 2010 10:22:23 PM EDT
To: mnorrington@stonemountainpd.org, khughes@stonemountaincity.org
Cc: Amy Fortenberry
Gentlemen,
I decided that in addition to blind-copying just one person (which I am also doing), I should open-copy those whom I allege either traffic in drugs or launder drug money. Seems only fair that since I have the "moral" upper hand, and the attempt today (5th formal, 6th including informal within the last two months) to commit me was unsuccessful, although the nurse and her three deputies (three times the number of law officers what had ever come out before. Someone must have predicted real trouble, and the nurse spent tons of time making sure I understood that even Don Weise of Alyson Books in NYC has been calling little ol' Dekalb County, GA to complain that i have been telling the truth that he does not pay his writers and therefore the only option is to commit me. Pathetic Republican Party shill response! LOL!!!
Ya gotta admit, y'all are perfect fool characters for my book. If you treat me decently, your character will be redeemed by the end of the book. THAT IS THE POWER OF THE AUTHOR. Hello!?! And it would be truthful. I'm all about showing respect and helping each other, but all you want to do is steal my dignity, which can not be separated from me short of death. And you've tried that once already. Hello Amy-the-poisoner!!! It took only five days for my urine to become normal, eight days for the abdominal muscles (sore from five hours of solid retching) to heal past the pain.
I forgot to insist that y'all take a lock of my hair for the crime lab so we can settle the poisoning issue once and for all (or on city stationary, sign off that you refuse to do so.) Investigators: please contact me at your earliest convenience, or have someone else handle the evidence collection if you cannot in time. It must be done before noon tomorrow (Wed).
I intend to try to bum a couple of smokes at the Citgo C-store. Hope they aren't closed. I could have a nic-fit at any time, but never get too out of control. I simply allow myself to do nothing but win.
Have y'all ever tried that attitude? It only works when coupled with mindfulness, and y'all are severely limited in THAT domain.
Tally Ho! Hit me with your next Best-Shot (take Viagra first. no offense but you need something)
Sincerely,
Scott D. Kenan
Stn. Mtn., GA 30083
Everyone should feel free to call me to ask questions, day or night. A few have been doing that. I know that bluff doesn't fly with the gulity, but the innocent are not as "connected" to the "system". Some of you know EXACTLY what that means. Thank God, it is not ALL of you who do. Please call. I'm actually a quite reasonable guy when treated with respect (agreement with me is NOT necessary).
Ooops! I started going into nicotine withdrawal (since Officer Norrington has been unable to deliver the pack of cigarettes he promised to bring me several hours ago -- part of our deal since I'm flat broke until tomorrow -- to help avoid WWIII (metaphorical comment). Actually, I think our investigators WANT me to rip the white drug traffickers in City government new assholes (metaphorical comment), although they didn't SPECIFICALLY say that to me.
Brothers are all cool in my book! LOL. Who's zoomin' who now, huh Honkeys??? Well, nic-fit is definitely kicking in here, so I hope everyone is entertained. i sure am, but I'm gonna go see about gettin' me a fag or two. ("fag" is archaic slang for "cigarette")
In the New Reality, drunk, homeless black fellas will be paid big money to sexually re-educate white Republican women (and men, yikes!)
DISCLAIMER: I am a creative writer and as such, allow all my readers to determine for themselves if I write fiction or non-fiction. I just hate to categorize myself, but you may.
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