Saturday, August 24, 2013

The Saturday Email Bag (revealed)!!! (NOT that inviting, actually)

 
A GREAT Labor-Saving IDEA, no???
 
 
 



>>> BEFORE THE MAIL IS PASTED IN:



1. Thanks to ALL who visited this blog yesterday, making it the FOURTH biggest day for blog hits EVER!!! TOP HIT was http://scottkenan.blogspot.mx/2013/08/a-cavalcade-of-timely-images-is-always.html , followed by: http://scottkenan.blogspot.mx/2012/08/pink-flamingos-straight-just-ice.html .


And while FRIDAY's HITS were ALSO very high (and I set a PERSONAL RECORD of posting SIX TIMES), yesterday's ONE POST bested Friday by a couple of hundred hits ANYWAY.


 
OK, I GET THE HINT!!!



Now see if you can find the faces of TWO of my personal heroes in this image:







2. And HERE is an interesting graphic I chanced on this morning:



 
Having once BEEN an introvert, I recommend DITCHING THIS ADVICE ENTIRELY!!!
 
 
Rather, "INTROVERTS" should be chased around Public Squares with young willow branches attempting to "tan their asses".



If Jesus was SERIOUS about God "spitting out the mediocre" -- SURELY he starts with the introverts who REFUSE TO ACCEPT that EVERYONE has something important to say (having been created in the so-called "Image and Likeness of the Goddessinesses" -- such and so forth!!!


3. I had COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN, but John Uecker (who smothered Tennessee Williams with a pillow -- and who STILL SEEMS TO THINK I blame him for this or think he needs to be LEGALLY PROSECUTED, I do NOT!!!), has an ACTIVE BLOG!!! (somewhat inactive in recent years, but interesting NONETHELESS):



 
 
This is a little taste of it -- for MORE, please see: http://therunningsun.blogspot.mx/ .


* * *


4. Having now LISTENED to Bob Jones's VOICEMAIL enough times to become TRAINED TO ANSWER HIS PHONES (should he ever need a SECRETARY -- although I'm now TOO FAT TO SIT IN BOB's LAP), I can also say I THINK I actually DO remember that voice.


CLEARLY Bob Jones has STRAIGHTENED UP AND FLOWN RIGHT (NOT a political comment)!!! His company is REAL and so whilest waiting to be in DIRECT PHONE CONTACT, I launched a SPY SATELLITE to get a gander at his rural Pennsylvania HIDEAWAY, and if there were NO SNAFUs, here you can even see the Bob-Mobile in the driveway!!!:


 
NO POOL!!!
 
 
 
And last I KNEW (high school), Bob drove a VW Bug. Here in Mexico, those are STILL VERY POPULAR -- and marginally running. We call them "VOH-choe"s.


More, when there actually IS more . . .


5. When I mentioned a few days ago that GMAIL had suddenly DUMPED 1,500 (or similar number), of emails I HAD NEVER SEEN into my main account -- I can tell you that TODAY there are now a total of ABOUT 6,000 emails that have arrived this week that are ALL OVER A WEEK OLD!!!


They are mostly JUNK, and I have NO TIME to sort through them now. I just ask the CIA/NSA/Google people to PLEASE allow my email to arrive in a TIMELY BASIS -- from NOW ON!!!


Thank you "in advance".




>>> TODAY's MAIL:






1. I have heard from Tony Narducci (author of this book that I recommend anyone interested in Tennessee Williams BUY: http://www.amazon.com/In-Frightened-Heart-Tennessee-Williamss/dp/1475965958 ), and we are relating well, now.


I'm completely satisfied that he actually had a REAL JOB since leaving Tom Williams, and we are getting SPECIFIC about some possible co-marketing, etc.


But you might get a HOOT out of a little email I sent him this morning:


Hi Tony,

I forgot to mention a couple of things:

1. I STILL always think of you as younger, cuter, and hotter than me -- and I LOVE that you had so much fun when you were running around in a younger, frisky bod (and CLEARLY had enough money to travel and go to an "unspecified" number of Circuit Parties, etc.)!!!

Jobs like you had ALLOW for that kind of lifestyle -- so BULLY FOR YOU!!!

2. I TOO love antiquities and exploring the kinds of places you mention.

3. I really have no idea if I'd "wax amorous" with you or not. If things COME UP for one of us but not the other, BIG DEAL -- we've all been there before!!!

4. If I got a SERIOUS FACE LIFT -- and you are not allergic to a little makeup -- we could travel about the country -- or even the WORLD -- like a BIG JOKING TENT-REVIVAL MEETIN' (or a Chautauqua thingy) -- me as my younger self, and you as Tennessee Williams (although you'd be YOU as well).

5. I'm up for ANY kind of GOOD FUN, nes pas???


Scott



2. >>> AND A CONVERSATION WITH A STUDENT VOTING-RIGHTS ADVOCATE:


Hey Chris/Alison,
 
 
What an amazing story!!! Also amazing that you CHANGED THE NAME ATTACHED TO YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS so quickly and easily -- HA!!! (Too bad its not that simple to change your sex!!!) And frankly, I was gonna tease you a tad about this: "Did stuff underwater around country orange." -- I'm wondering where "country orange" is.


>>> ADDED AT 2:12 PM, CDT: C/A wrote BACK with the following explanation:

Country Orange is a term in the submarine community which means any country that is generally not friendly to the US. Even amongst submariners, we can't discuss what we've done or what area we operated in. So when we're sharing stories, we substitute the actual unfriendly country's name with Country Orange.
 
 
But to your question which I now know really IS serious, I would follow my earlier advice. Since I lived in North Carolina through ONLY the 2011 polling (Mayor and City Council elections in Wilmington) -- and lived homeless under the Fourth Street Viaduct until I early-voted at the Library before moving into Mercy House Homeless Shelter for Narco-Traffickers (only to get a lot of SEX from other residents -- and a plantar wart on my right foot that I STILL am not rid of) -- AND NOW I live in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico -- I am NOT really an expert on voting in the state of North Carolina.
 
 
However, if it's ANY CONSOLATION, my father (I see you are trained in sonar), was in sonar in WWII in the Mediterranean and North Atlantic -- and was ONE OF THE NAVY's BEST!!! He's going strong now at 95 years of age, and has a HUGE DICK!!!
 
 
 
WHOOOPS!!! Sorry -- you are trying to get rid of yours.
 
 
 
Well, I do wish you all the best in your endeavors!!!
 
 
Scott
 
 
On Sat, Aug 24, 2013 at 11:44 AM, Chris Redden <postoffice.spambox@gmail.com> wrote:
 

 
Well, I'll tell you what I've been "up to" since you seem so interested.

I graduated from high school in Pflugerville Texas back in 2000. 

Went to a government trade school in San Marcos Texas and earned an apprenticeship in CNC machining. 

Couldn't find work in my profession. 

Worked crummy low wage jobs for a few years. 

Enlisted in the Navy around 2010. Became a submarine sonar tech. Made petty officer third class. Trained in advanced acoustic theory at the top of my class (there was only 8 students). Did stuff underwater around country orange.

Received a discharge for being "morbidly obese". Challenged it in court and won (mostly by just lifting my shirt and showing the judge my abs).

And finally going through the transgender process of going from male to female. It's still early on so I still present as male, but hormone therapy is coming along.

So yeah, that's what's up.

Anyways, I was wondering what date do you think would be best to drive down. It's difficult to plan and budget for something that has so many unknowns. I'd hate to make that long drive down only to discover that the polls aren't open yet. Fingers crossed for the best time to be a weekend

Sent from my iPhone
 

On Aug 24, 2013, at 12:31 PM, Scott Kenan wrote:
Dear Ms. Mendez,

What a nice surprise to hear from you -- even though I don't know you -- and THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN about North Carolina college students VOTING RIGHTS!!!

The best answer for your question is to -- a week or more in advance of voting day -- google "student voting" at the college you would like to help. That way you should find some contacts that you can then contact so you can drive yer car like a "Tennessee Williams legless bird" -- never parking, never tiring . . .


"Orpheus Descending"  by Tennessee Williams
Act One
 
Val: You might think there's many and many kinds of people in this world but, Lady, there's just two kinds of people, the ones that are bought and the buyers! No! - there's one other kind...
Lady: What kind's that?
Val: The kind that's never been branded.
Lady: You will be, man.
Val: They got to catch me first.
Lady: Well, then, you better not settle down in this country.
Val: You know they's a kind of bird that don't have legs so it can't light on nothing but has to stay all its life on its wings in the sky? That's true. I seen one once, it had died and fallen to earth and it was light-blue colored and its body was tiny as your little finger, that the truth, it had a body was tiny as your little and so light on the palm of your hand it didn't weigh more than a feather, but its wings spread out this wide but they were transparent, the color of the sky and you could see through them. That's what they call protection coloring. Camouflage, they call it. You can't tell those birds from the sky and that's why the hawks don't catch them, don't see them up there in the high bluesky near the sun! 

Lady: How about in grey weather?

Val: They fly so high in grey weather the goddam hawks would get dizzy. But those little birds, they don't have no legs at all and they live their whole lives on the wing, and they sleep on the wind, that's how they sleep at night, they just spread their wings and go to sleep on the wild like other birds fold their wings and go to sleep on a tree... -They sleep on the wind and -never light on this earth but one time when they die.

Lady: -I'd like to be one of those birds.

Val: So'd I like to be one of those birds; they's lots of people would like to be one of those birds and never be- corrupted!

Lady: If one of those birds ever dies and falls on the ground and you happened to find it, I wish you would show it to me because I think maybe you just imagine there is a bird of that kind of existence. Because I don't think nothing living has ever been that free, not even nearly. Show me one of them birds and I'll say. Yes, God's made one perfect creature!-I sure would give this mercantile store and every bit of stock in it to be that tiny bird the color of the sky...for one night to sleep on the wind and - float! - around under th'-stars...
 
* * *

Of course I ALSO noticed your peculiar email address -- so googled it to see what you've been UP TO. I only found four or five things, including a site where a young man asks if he can join the US NAVY and contractually be able to serve in his home INTERIOR state. Although I didn't find your email address there, perhaps one of the "shown names" was YOU -- just not "Alison Mendez".

The quite PRACTICAL answer is that the Coast Guard (only), WILL contract with recruits (pre-signing only), to keep a person in a given state the first 18 months of a 48 months enlistment -- NOT COUNTING basic training which will be in Cape May, NJ, where while ON LEAVE, Coasties are INVITED PERSONALLY BY ME to shop at my old business, www.whalestalecapemay.com .

 
Be SURE to bring A LOT OF MONEY!!!
 
But your BEST writing is the review of the The Heights on Oltorf apartments in Plano, TX -- you wrote a fairly lengthy, "serious" review that ended in this FABULOUS SURPRISE ENDING

 
"Overall:

"The Heights (back when I lived there) was an oasis of civility in a sea of ghetto trash. The surrounding neighborhood was bad and the police where around all the time on calls and disruptions, but The Heights apartments seems to be good.

"The one thing I was very unhappy about is that the apartments are a 4 bedroom 2 bathroom and each bedroom is leased. You don't really get to pick who lives with you. The doors on each bedroom are flimsy and can easily be kicked or punched open. Heck, even a trip and fall towards the door could knock it open, despite the lock on the door.


Read morehttp://www.apartmentratings.com/rate/TX-Austin-The-Heights-on-Oltorf-1451018.html#ixzz2cu7tWC00

 
May I suggest you contact Mr. Jerry Seinfeld, who nearly ten years ago published a WHOLE BOOK (or two or three), of quirky, anonymous reviews, letters to editors, TOP POLITICIANS etc. (starting to sound like my BLOG, no???) -- I imagine he could give you some pointers in your literary quest!!!

I'd give you his email address if it were on the "top of my head" -- but with MY HEIGHT, that's so high up that neither wingless bird nor three-passenger voter-mobiles can land there.

All best in your career!!!

Scott

On Fri, Aug 23, 2013 at 10:33 PM, AlisonMendez <postoffice.spambox@gmail.com> wrote:
 
Hello. I've been reading several articles about how it's becoming almost impossible for students to vote. Specifically citing from your blog:

—The GOP-controlled Watauga County Board of Elections in Boone, North Carolina, voted along party lines to close an early voting and general election polling place at Appalachian State University. Instead, the county limited early voting to one site in Boone and created the state’s third-largest voting precinct, with 9,300 voters at a precinct designed for 1,500, with only thirty-five parking places. It’s inaccessible by public transportation and over a mile from campus along a 45 mph road with no sidewalk. “I feel like the people (students) who really care might come all the way out here to vote,” said Ashley Blevins, a junior at Appalachian State, “but I know a lot of people who are like, ‘eh, it’s too far—I don’t think I’m going to walk that far,’ because they don’t really have another way of getting here.”

I was wondering if there's some organization that's planning to help these students reach the polls. I'm giving strong considerations to taking a few days off, driving all the way down there from Norfolk, VA and running a free shuttle to and from the polling location. I wouldn't need to park, just drop off or pick up students.

Do you know of any organization I could sync with to achieve this? Or would I be alone in doing this? My car only seats three passengers which isn't much, but I want to help. Three per trip is better than none at all I think, and if there's several people helping with the free shuttle, it would make a difference.

Thanks in advance.



 
TOP image-googling result for "lifting my shirt and showing the judge my abs" does NOT show our friend -- but at least exposes HOT PIT!!!
 
 
 
 
Scott
 
.

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